So, I really wish I could give you a hug and make it all better for you, but as it is with hugs, it doesn't do shit. Well, maybe make you feel a little bit better but that's not enough now, is it?

- - -
When you cook a piece of toast, which side of the toaster do you put it in?
Whichever side I want to put it in.

Do you sing along to music?
Mm. Only when it's that band.

If so, chorus or the main singer?
Mainly chorus and sometimes parts of the song.

When was the last time you washed dishes?
Heh. Must have been last week. My sister does it now.

Washed a dog?
Never.

What did you have for supper last night?
I ate a Swiss roll.

How old were you when your parents told you the truth about Santa?
I never believed in Santa actually.

Do you think Pepsi is better in the bottle or can?
I didn't know there's a difference.

Have you ever shot an animal?
Gee. Never.

What was the last song stuck in your head?
That Girl. Hahaha. It's a song that makes you want to go la la la, I'm happy, life's good; so fuck you!

Have you ever talked to a pinecone?
...um, no.

What was the last thing you put on your head?
Hood.

What color is your cell phone?
Black.

Have you ever put peanut butter on the roof of a horse’s mouth?
No.

How about a dog?
No.

What type of deodorant do you use, assuming you use one?
It varies.

Last show you watched on TV?
90210. Sort of.

What is the best flavor of Jelly Bellies?
I love everything red.

Have you ever body surfed at the beach?
Hahaha. No.

What is the strangest thing you have ever found?
I can't think of one right now.

Have you ever said, “Brontosaurus Blubber butt”?
Never.

Name one character from the Simpsons.
Lisa.

Name one character from King of the Hill.
Bahaha. I can't stand it.

Do you wear mirrored or regular sunglasses?
I just don't wear sunglasses.

What is the best candle scent?
I don't know the exact name of the scent.

Have you ever stirred up a fire ant hill?
No.

Have you ever had a laughing fit in church?
I'm never in church.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
As many licks as it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop.

Have you ever speeded up a vinyl record just to hear squeaky voices?
Nope.

Ever fallen on a Christmas tree?
Never.

Did you ever believe in the boogeyman?
Nah.

Do you have any scars on your left index finger?
Nope.

Have you ever examined one of your digits?
WTF.

Have you ever eaten a jalapenõ pepper for money?
Hahaha. That'd be hot but never.

When was the last time you actually wrote a letter to someone?
It was never.

Have you ever fallen out of a hammock by yourself?
Hammock just gives me bad vibes so I'm never in it.

When was the last time you rubbed the Buddha’s belly?
Gee. No.

Does your clock make noise?
Apart from the tick-tock, no.

Do raisins belong in cookies?
Sure. I love them in my cookies.

How do you like your meat done?
I don't eat meat.

Do you buy those email chains or just delete them as soon as you see them?
I delete it. Those are just retarded.

Which is funnier a mime pretending to be in a box or trapped in a box?
Mime isn't funny at all. In fact, I feel like punching him in the face.

What is the best prank you have ever pulled?
The only prank I've ever done was dialling random numbers and asking to speak to random people and then simply just hang up on the person.

Can you say the alphabet backwards?
I could if I try really hard.

When was the last time you literally slapped yourself?
This afternoon. I couldn't shut myself up. Haha.